Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Second Civil War?

It has nothing to do with slavery. Obviously if slavery were the issue, both Georgia and Tennessee would want many slaves, forever. Instead, the Georgia legislature is considering a resolution to annex an extra mile on its border with Tennessee. The proposal has elicited “tongue-in-cheek saber rattling from Tennessee lawmakers,” who enjoy war. But leave fun to the liberals; this thing has some serious consequences: “If the border is redrawn, the new state line would fall across Nickajack Reservoir. That would allow parched Georgians to tap into the waters of the dammed Tennessee River.” If Georgia can’t annex part of Tennessee, everyone in Georgia will die.

As far as old people on the border are concerned, the bill is very much screwing over old people on the border:

[Tennessee resident Joel J.] Kyle, 69, said he has no desire to be annexed by Georgia, which he gladly departed because of its taxes, and hopes the idea is “just a pipe dream.” “If it ever came to that, I would probably move,” he said. “I’ve got seven acres here, and we’re set up pretty well, but I wouldn’t ever want to be in the state of Georgia again, to be honest with you.”
Amen. Who would want to live in Georgia? Isn’t that the state where they used to send England’s prisoners? And the tax fairies… Christ, the tax fairies!

Also, Tennesseeans can deal. It’s not their land anyway. Jesus gave this mile, and all its Jesus Water, to the Georgians many, many years ago. Like 200 years ago, when he was a carpenter’s apprentice:

The resolution, which has passed early hurdles but has not received final passage, claims that the boundary was erroneously surveyed in 1818 and that Georgia has never accepted it. The resolution calls for the creation of a “Georgia-Tennessee Boundary Line Commission” that would perform joint surveys and change the line to the “definite and true” boundary line: exactly following the 35th parallel. “We’re not talking about sucking it dry,” said Rep. Harry Geisinger, a Republican who sponsored the resolution in the Georgia House. “We’re talking about augmenting some water needs, and as you know, the Tennessee has got plenty of water in it.”
Legislators in Tennessee, however, are taking the issue of their land very seriously:

State Sen. Andy Berke, a Chattanooga Democrat, took the Senate floor and jokingly proposed a winner-take-all wrestling match or football game.

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