Thursday, July 24, 2008

The Dark Knight rocked my world.

Okay so everyone has heard that the new Batman movie was unbelievable. So I'm going to skip that part. Basically, your life is incomplete if you don't see this movie. Bottom line.

What was I NOT a fan of? The INSANE old lady sitting next to me. My friends and I walk into the theater. Of course, there are 6 sold out showings of this movie at Green Hills - it's absolute chaos. We stroll in like 10 minutes before it's supposed to start and clearly, there are not 4 seats available. So we split up. This lady from the back hollers at us and points to a couple seats, so T and I head to the back. Our first sign to run should have been the look of relief on the face of the guy sitting next to us. He was entirely too grateful to have two people between him and Bertha. (Note: Bertha wasn't her real name. At least I don't think it was. That would be unfortunate. It seems appropriate for my purposes though.)

So Bertha rambles on about the movie. I mention that I'm tired. Being as it's after midnight and I have already been awake for 18 hours and worked and went to school all day. She goes "SUCK IT UP! It's BATMAN!" I was like, great okay. Then she notices that the sound is off. Obviously, it was supposed to be, as they were walking through, checking tickets, etc... the previews haven't even started. But she was upset. So, naturally, she takes her shoes off and wanders around for someone to inform.

She comes back. She overhears me telling a story to T about someone who told me to shut up. I hear "Yeah, GREAT IDEA." At this point I'm pretty sure I dug my nails into his arm and told him I was going to take the old lady out. Unsatisfied with the theater's response for her request for volume, Barefoot Bertha started wandering around again. I made T switch places with me while she was up. So naturally, when she returns, she starts talking to him instead.

I overhear something about him keeping me quiet. Bertha's plan for silencing me was to tell T to kiss me so I couldn't talk. I believe there was a lecture about keeping the phones in pockets so she wouldn't have to deal with the glow. Some cussing people out around us to shut up. The movie finally starts, and apparently wasn't good enough for her to stay through to the end - she rolled out about 3/4 way through.

Incredible. If I run into a Bertha tonight at the X Files premiere, roomie's gonna have to hold me back, because I might cry if I get kicked out.

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