Now, I know I've been accused of being anti-abstinence so I want to make something clear: I'm all for abstaining if that's what a gal wants to do. Obviously. But if young women are not having sex because they think they'll be damaged goods, dirty, and "blemished" otherwise--well, then that's pretty f***ing problematic.
As is purity proponents calling themselves counterculture and revolutionary. The pop culture image of women and sexuality is gross, and it is likely to have girls seeking an alternative. But an alternative that judges women just as much (if not more) on their sexuality isn't really an option. A real rebellion would be teaching young women that their sexuality is their own, and that their ability to be a moral person is based on their compassion, kindness, ethics and judgment--not their hymen.
Wow. So call me naive, but the choice I made to abstain was because I wanted to stay pure in God's eyes. It has nothing to do with other people's judgement, or that I'd be "damaged goods" in the eyes of anyone else. What anyone else says doesn't matter - this isn't a decision I made for them. It's not a guilt-ridden decision.
Yes, it is counterculture. There's no way around that. Being nearly 24 years old, I know very few people who have made the decision that I have. I'm proud of it. And I'm proud of my friends that make that decision as well - because everything else in our world tells us not to. It's not a judgement thing, it's a safety thing, a spiritual thing... a choice thing.